I wish I knew how to quit you…American politics. (#92)

I’ve studied politics since I was in seventh grade.  I was told that I received a perfect score on my Constitution test, I actually enjoyed Modern World History in high school, I took A.P Government classes and would go on to become a political science major in college.  Eventually I would go to policy school to learn about…policy…as you may have guessed.  I learned how to think about it, how to analyze it, how to quantify it, how to decide if it was equitable, how to pay for it, yada, yada, yada….

My point is that I know more about policy and politics than I do anything else.

And for the past four years, I’ve been trying to break up with it.  “Be free Blackbird, be free!” I tell myself, splashing water on my face when I’m up late at night looking at CNN.  I’ve tried to tell myself, year after year, over and over again to no avail that I’ve left that life behind, but good ways die hard, especially when you still paying for them (or not) via Sallie Mae.

Leaving my policy-ing and government-ing (yes, I know those aren’t real words) ways behind me hasn’t been a process to say the least.  For almost four years I’ve operated a blog that has been a mesh pot of pieces about politics, race, and culture as my secret way to quench my thirst.

But now, I think that I’m finally ready to let it go.

I think.

Birthed out of soul-wrenching frustration and indignation, I gave my political blog a provocative name, one that I would cringe to share with my old coworkers from the public sector.

Past experiences led me to question the integrity of everything related to the field which I had professionally aligned and believed that the entire system needed to be gutted.

Many days, I still have difficulty believing that things in our political system can change.  However, looking out to the future, I am more hopeful than ever that I am a wrong.  So like an old friend, I feel the time is drawing near to finally let the politico in me go.  I’m sure it will find a better, more kinder lover out there — much better than me. I don’t even know what a non-political me feels like, but with time, I can only hope that letting it go of that part of me won’t feel so bittersweet.

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